I would like to thank the wonderful women here at How Do You Do It? for inviting me to join the team. I’m thrilled to be able to contribute.
I get a variety of reactions to my screen name, which I’ve used on email and various sites around the internet for years. Some people “get it” and chuckle. Some people ask what it means, some get it mixed up, and some can’t understand why I’ve kept it even though they’re older now. Maybe I’m wrong, but I think some people wonder how I could get in such a situation. Even yesterday, a good friend joked about how she knew how to use birth control, implying I didn’t.
I chuckle about my three under two dilemma now, but those childbearing years were a period of prayer and heartbreak and more than a little desperation. I got married at 30, and never dreamed that there would be any problems bearing children. When I first became pregnant I felt that incredible surge of joy and expectation. I bought every pregnancy book, talked of it incessantly, and delighted in the whole experience.
My husband accompanied me to my 12 week visit to the doctor. It was time to hear the heartbeat, and we were both excited. But there was no heartbeat. I had to wait and worry for a whole day before I could get an ultrasound. Then it was confirmed. The pregnancy was over, and I had to have a D & C.
My husband and I both grieved. It was a shock. I was instructed to wait several months before trying again, and told that there was no reason to expect it to happen again. But it did. Another “missed miscarriage” and another D & C. I started learning how many of my friends had had miscarriages. Why did I never know? Were they all ashamed? Those of us who have had miscarriages need to let others know that we’re here to support them. That grief is as real as when any other baby is lost.
I was given oral progesterone and daily baby aspirin. That helped me carry my beautiful daughter to term. Because I was approaching 35 when I finally had her, we decided to try for the next child in a year. Each of my previous pregnancies had taken many months of trying. When she was 11 months old, we stopped using birth control and this time, I became pregnant instantly.
My husband and I had been to the pediatrician so many times together and we were so confident of this pregnancy, that I went alone at 12 weeks. I was already starting to show, and I just knew in my heart it was twins. I told the doctor, who laughed it off, “Everyone gets bigger faster the second time around.” then she weighed and measured me and admitted I was “big for my dates.”
To satisfy my curiosity, she pulled in a small, old ultrasound they kept in the office. She turned the screen so I could see it and started to scan.
“See, there’s the head.” and then “. . .oh! There’s another head!” I burst out crying. Uncontrollable tears of joy.
When my oldest daughter was 19 months old, I gave birth to a 6 lb, 3 oz baby girl and a 6 lb, 15 oz baby boy.
That’s why I had three under two. I couldn’t be happier with the way it all turned out.
My oldest is 11 now, and the twins are 10. You can follow our daily adventures at Lit and Laundry
Related posts
- Introduction to genetics….
Twin mommy rant for the weekend We are at BJ’s...
10 responses so far ↓
1 Susan Heim // Jun 16, 2008 at 9:03 am
This situation seems to happen so often! It took more than a year for my friend to conceive her daughter, so she and her husband started trying again right away, figuring it would take another year to conceive the next one. Of course, she conceived right away, and their girls are only 11 months apart! Once the body figures out what to do, it catches on quickly the second time around! Anyway, congratulations on your beautiful trio!
2 Becky // Jun 16, 2008 at 11:30 am
What a sweet post! I’m excited to hear more from your point of view.
Becky
http://www.stinkylemsky.typepad.com/
3 Rebecca // Jun 16, 2008 at 12:02 pm
I think that if you had “three under two” then you get to keep that username as long as you want! What an accomplishment…..
I’m sorry to hear about your losses but happy that you ended up with three great kids. I’m looking forward to hearing more about what it’s like to have older twins. At this point, it’s hard to imagine surviving the toddler years, much less what what comes after is like.
4 twinmom122606 // Jun 16, 2008 at 3:04 pm
That was a great introduction! Welcome aboard! Can’t wait to read more of your blog soon. Your perspecitve will give me a glimpse of what my life will be like some day(my twins are almost 18 months and my oldest is almost 4)!
One of my best friends actually went through the same thing..3 miscarriages in a row(2 D & C’s). She had finally made an appt for a fertility dr. the month she finally got preo. It was rough for me..to not only see her go through all this…but in the mean time i got prego with the twins and had to call her and tell her that i was not only prego..but having two. I felt SOO guilty! She has a beautiful precious little boy now…thank goodness!
What a blessing to have 3 beautiful children after all you went through!
5 Lori // Jun 16, 2008 at 11:22 pm
I went through a similar situation. Got married at 30, started trying at 31, miscarried w/IUI at 32, several years of fertility treatments and finally preggo with b/g twins at 34 w/IVF. We wanted a third, but figured we’d need to do IVF again. Nope. I am now 33 weeks with a singleton and the twins are 15 months. We are really excited (and tired). Most days, I think I’ve successfully learned how to laugh off some of the more stupid comments made by people. My response to “You are going to have your hands full” is “… and a leg too!” I look forward to reading your posts.
6 Shawn // Jun 17, 2008 at 6:05 am
We’ve already met but just wanted to say hello, welcome and nice to meet you again. And, since your twins are 10, I take comfort that I, too, will survive toddlerhood.
7 Cynthia // Jun 17, 2008 at 10:39 am
I think three under two is pretty cool.
I am reading your blog daily for inspiration and a dose of what I can look forward to!
8 Kelly // Jun 17, 2008 at 2:04 pm
Hi,
I too had a simlair situation (3 under 14 months). I got married at 37, tried on our own for 6 months. Went through 3 IUI’s (two took then lost, very early, told us they were “chemical pregnancies”. The first IVF took, we had a son in Feb of 06. Never thought we could get pregnant on our own! My OB did tell me to be careful it could happen! Well, when my son was about 5 months or so I found out I was 5 1/2 weeks pregnant with twins! We delivered two very healthy and beautiful girls in April of 07( 5lbs 5oz and 4lbs 2oz, both came home with me after a 5 day hospital stay, neither one in the NICU) . My son was only 14 months! I wanted my family by the time I turned 40, and I beat that with 3 months to spare.
Sure life is hectic, but life with my three healthy children is amazing and beautiful! I wouldn’t change a thing!!!
When people see me out with all 3, they say God bless you, and I tell them he already has!
Thank you for letting me share my story with you!
Kelly
9 Jen C. // Jun 17, 2008 at 4:57 pm
As a mom of a 23-month old son and 2- month old b/g twins, I’m also so happy to hear that you have survived for 10 years because some days it feels like I won’t survive the next 10 minutes. So glad to have your spin on things here on the blog!!
10 Sara // Jun 30, 2008 at 10:56 pm
I’m still pregnant with twins, but within the next 4 months I will also be the mom of 3 under 2. If they make it to full term, my daughter will be about 22 months old when the boys are born. One of my older relatives this weekend who has a very limited short-term memory told me at least 3 times yesterday that “your going to have your hands full.” Right now at 23 weeks, I’m still wondering how to survive the pregnancy with a toddler to care for and hoping I don’t need bed rest since my husband is gone most of the week.
It’s nice to see you’ve survived well the last 10+ years. Thanks for the encouragement.
Leave a Comment