Comments on: Going against conventional wisdom

By: littlebitesofheaven

littlebitesofheaven — Tue, 07 Oct 2008 19:39:56 +0000

i always look at conventional wisdom as a guideline…i try it out and if it doesn’t work than we just do things our own way. this is a great post about listening to your kids rather than the “experts” and doing what works for them!

By: Anne

Anne — Mon, 06 Oct 2008 20:39:41 +0000

Yeah. I don’t like it when people make that comment: Oh it’s so much harder with kids 2 years apart!

*What about twins who are 2 and a 1 year old?*

Or one of my dear friends with 2 (!!!) sets of twins and a teenager?!

OK Competismugmommy. Go home.

By: SeaBird

SeaBird — Thu, 02 Oct 2008 21:36:25 +0000

A few months ago I had to separate our boys for naps, but then a couple of months later, they could be together again. I let them have some “talking time,” but then it’s rest/quiet time. One usually complies and the other often doesn’t and has to be reminded a couple of times (gently and loveingly, of course – ha!).

By: Trish

Trish — Thu, 02 Oct 2008 21:17:32 +0000

my twin boys sleep together at night but mostly separately for naps too.
It works for us too – if they are together more often than not it is all giggles at first and then tears …or me pulling my hair out.
I am glad others break the rules too.
Glad it worked for you.

By: Gena Marshall

Gena Marshall — Tue, 30 Sep 2008 21:37:34 +0000

What conventional wisdom did I ignore? I happen to believe that SIDS is caused by flame retardants in crib mattresses interacting with household fungus and producing a gas toxic to babies. The research is really solid, but for reasons I can’t fully understand, it’s not a widespread view.

I wrapped my mattresses with plastic and slept my babies from day two on their stomach.

They seemed happy, had strong necks and slept through the night at 8 weeks. Whether or not these things are related, I can’t say. But I didn’t worry about SIDS.

Puts me in a bit of a quandry. Twins are at higher risk for SIDS, as are second singleton babies and third babies even more. The theory is they are more likely to be sleeping on used mattresses. Mattress wrapping has a 100% success rate, whether the mattress is used or not.

I want to pass the word along, and I have, but I feel like a freak because no one seems to buy it but me and my mom’s generation (who slept their babies on their stomachs and hadn’t heard of SIDS, and want to explain it by some recent environmental cause.)

But you asked, so I’d love to share with other MOMs!

By: lesley

lesley — Tue, 30 Sep 2008 21:25:32 +0000

I hated to separate my twins, but they had different sleep requirements and Shenzie was always keeping Heaten awake. I was SO sad when we moved them to their own rooms at 17 months. Now at 2 years I wish we would have done it even sooner. They are still just as close as they always were, they have their own space if they need it, and most importantly they (and me) sleep SO much better. I’m glad you found the answer to your sleep issues. I agree, do whats best for your family, nobody knows your boys better than you do. =)

By: Rhonda (twinsanity)

Rhonda (twinsanity) — Tue, 30 Sep 2008 20:00:26 +0000

We were told we had to keep them on the same schedule. Feeding on demand made all of us much happier and we got a lot more sleep.

We were told that we shouldn’t rock them to sleep, stay with them ’til the fell asleep, and a variety of other things that would create sleep associations and prevent them from learning to go to sleep on their own. That was all a total crock. They’ve gone through stages of needing us to help them sleep and stages where they want us to leave them alone to go to sleep.

They only advice I ever give it out is to ignore all the advice givers and do what works best for your own family.

By: mamie

mamie — Tue, 30 Sep 2008 19:08:56 +0000

hmmmm, let’s see….
-do not rock them to sleep
-do not nap with them
-do not let them have pacifiers
-try not to let them run your life (haha)

i do not know…i just do not listen to the ‘wisdom’ anymore. wanna hear a really scary thing i did. i let my kids sleep on their tummies. it was the only way they would sleep. i remember my mom telling me it was the ‘wisdom’ of their time that babies on their backs would vomit and choke, so all babies slept on their tummies. i was with them while they slept, and i do not advocate that you (whoever you are) do what i did…but i do what works. they will be just fine in the long run…because my first aim, my one big desire is to do right and well by them. and a lot of times that is diametrically opposite to the ‘wisdom’ of out times.

By: Goddess in Progress

Goddess in Progress — Tue, 30 Sep 2008 18:04:59 +0000

I read this as my kids are up there chatting and screeching for the last hour… and that’s after a nice, tiring (you’d think!) runaround at a gym before lunch. Alright, we may need to separate, or at least try Alix’s tuck-in method… Argh.

By: alix b

alix b — Tue, 30 Sep 2008 17:02:31 +0000

My ID 27 month old boys sleep in the same room for both nap and nighttime, and we just recently started dealing with the same problem you describe regarding what we’ve dubbed the “anti-nap”. Singing, bouncing, chatting…they don’t fuss, but they’ll stay in there chirping (mostly) happily for over an hour sometimes! What I’ve done is give them a five-minute “get-your-energy-out” period in their cribs before coming back in to tuck them in for nap. Of course, they don’t heed the five minute rule whatsoever, but they do calm down and have been able (for the last several days–fingers X’d!) to go to sleep within about 10 minutes following the “tuck-in”. I’ve thought about the separate room thing but we lack space, so am hopeful that this will work–we’ll see! So glad you found something that works for you–naptime needs to be calm and quiet for EVERYONE’s sake!