Not only will you get through it, but you will conveniently forget how hard it was. my husband and I know it was hard, and we know we were exhausted, but we don’t remember those exact feelings. I wouldn’t trade my twin experience for anything.

1. Just do whatever it takes to make it through the day, one day at a time. Throw expectations out the window and just make sure everyone is adequately fed, rested, and semi-clean, yourself included. Don’t let any other chores take priority over feeding and sleep.

2. The first year after their birth may easily be the worst of your life. It will get better. It’s OK to talk about depression, meds, and therapy. Don’t expect your single-kid friends to have any idea what hell you are going through. Talk to other MoMs for empathy and tips. My mind, body, hormones, and general existence were in freak-out mode for most of the first year, and I consider myself to be a good mom. My MoM network really helped keep me sane, even if it was only a sounding board.

3. Don’t forget about your own needs. After the babies come out, almost no one cares about how mom is doing. I could barely walk for the first 4 weeks after my repeat c-section and needed more help than I got. I now wish I had stopped breastfeeding sooner than I did, as my quality of life improved drastically after the switch to formula, and nobody died from that “drastic” decision. I also should have taken more time off for myself, out of the house and without the babies.

4. When you make it to the other side (survived the first year with multiples), you will be a Professional Mom. You will be more confident in your mom abilities than you could ever imagine. Lots of times I see “regular” moms (not MoMs) and think they have no idea what they are doing, since they don’t have multiples. Of course, I only have twins and can only bow down to the moms of triplets or quads.

Oh, if someone offers help, JUST SAY YES!!

I agree with Cristal that it’s like childbirth in more ways than one. When someone is pregnant, there’s no point in saying, “Childbirth is really going to hurt. Like, horribly. It’s the worst pain of your life. You will scream for drugs.” I mean, does that information actually help someone in labor? But saying it’s a picnic doesn’t serve her well either — she needs to be able to prepare mentally however she can.

I generally say to people that: a) it’s really, really hard — the first six months we probably the hardest of my life — but now I thoroughly enjoy my children and my life; b) everyone’s experience is totally different, so you may get easy babies or you may get difficult babies or good or bad sleepers or any number of other unknowable variables, and c) time will keep moving forward whether you’re enjoying yourself or not, so try not to despair when things are hard. Just repeat (as I did ad nauseum): “It’s not forever, it’s for now.”

Also, and I think this bears repeating, you might not like to ask for help but you will need it. Take it EVERY TIME it is offered. We had a lot of help (both volunteer and paid) and it really has made all the difference.

I think we parents of multiples learn early what parents of singletons learn later: there is no “perfect” in parenting, and how boring would it be if there were!

I will confess having sometimes felt a feeling of superiority when a mom of a singleton complains because her newborn isn’t sleeping through the night at six weeks old or some such thing. In my head, there’s a mean little voice saying, “Oh yeah? Well my TWO babies didn’t sleep through the night until they were over a year old, my husband was in Iraq, and I work full time. Take that!” And then, I realize, this mom is still seeking perfection. She’s still seeking doing it all: having a tidy house and being rested and looking gorgeous, while I’m at peace with just doing the best I can and don’t mind that I look haggard and my kitchen counters are covered with paper.

But I tell myself that I’m making my children stronger and more independent. And I agree with Goddess in Progress, that having multiples (at least for me) forced me to be a little more laid back that I surely would have been with one baby…and that’s probably a good thing in the long run.